photo by: foamcow
1. The Power of Positive Parenting is about how we, as parents, should show good role model to our children. Argumentally, I don’t think positive parenting alone can bring the weight to our children’s behaviour. If children are smart enough to know the right thing; they will follow. If not, we’ve wasted our time. That’s why we need punishment style, authoritative or authoritarian style.
2. The Children Don’t Fear Us, At All. I fear that someday they will never listen to us anymore. They only listen to themselves and the whatever intuitive voice inside their heads.
3. I’ve witnessed a spoiled kid in front of my eyes; That day, I was wandering at Pasar Malam. I was looking for some food when I heard a boy keep talking dirty to his mom. Cursing.
4. There was one phrase the boy said to his mom, and I will remember it for the rest of my life – “Bodoh la mak ni, beli makanan pun yang tak sedap”.
5. He was cursing his mom. She didn’t reply back.
6. Accidently, I’d overheard his words, and I was so furious. If I was in a bad mood, I would make sure that boy tasted the floor of the Pasar Malam street that evening.
7. Ok, That’s the reality our society is infected today. See this video
8. Shouting and throwing tantrums, back in my old days, were allowed only if you wanted to dig your own grave. It’s considered suicidal. Back to the old days, my mother was so authoritative, that my siblings and I slipped our bad attitude under the carpet (tantrums, shoutings, too naughty, and so on).
9. Yes, the children should be scared at us. Scared of being punished at certain point. Scared of our disapproval. Scared of doing something wrong.
10. Children should feel an authoritative power above them. So they could behave.
11. No, the children should not being wandering around supermarket, or shopping mall without adult presence.
12. Positive parenting; I think everyone should apply positive parenting approach in their household rules. Parents should show good things such as high manners, and proper language usage.
13. Without physical punishment? I don’t think so. What if they didn’t to listen or to follow our behaviour as a role model? Should we punish them? Or Should we reason with them first. In my opinion, children cannot decide on his own, therefore we should reason with them on certain matters only. The rest, we should decide for them.
14. Reason with them only get them more frustrated because they really don’t really understand the true value of “why we should not screaming inside the mosque”, for example.
15. As a conclusion, Children should be raised on balancing of positive and punishing. Parenting with heavy punishment will retard their creativity and courage in doing something new.
One Response to Positive Parenting Alone Is Not Enough
KittyCat September 10, 2010
What a naughty boy! I think the Mum should have said something ler but I know a lot of Mums (and Dads) who will just say, “He’s just a kid” and think nothing of it.
My father was very strict – no way would I be able to say something like that to my mother!
We’re also quite firm with our kids. We are trying to teach them respect but not to the point of “You must listen to us because we are adults or because we say so.”
I do try to reason with him and try to put things at a level he can understand. Scolding or punishing him without a reason DOES NOT work with him because he is very, very stubborn…