Fatherhood

Someone raised a question at Quora about leaving her child unattended for one minute. “How long can you leave a baby unattended in a car? Assuming it’s not too hot or cold out, and you leave the motor running. Also, assuming it’s a safe neighborhood”. There’s one particular answers that I find hilarious: “For the amount of time it takes to travel from the driver’s door to the passenger door (Miguel Valdespino, professional amateur)”. One answer that is brutally honest is ZERO.

If you leave your baby with the motor car running, here’s a horror story from Justin Freeman, Former Patrol Officer:

When I was a police officer, we had a situation one night when a father left his vehicle running with a baby in the car seat to duck into a business in a strip mall. A car thief, seeing the opportunity (but not the baby), slipped into the vehicle and took off. The father frantically called 911 and reported it as a kidnapping – which set our entire department into swarm mode as officers got pulled off of other calls to saturate the area.

Well, you CANNOT leave your baby alone. Like. Ever. A baby has a gifted talent to blow up things in 100 meter radius when he feels lonely. Well, at least that was my imagination when I have a thought to take a nap while nannying my baby . Do not compromise your baby safety, because if you do that, if you are in my circle of friends, I’ll lose my respect upon you.

Infographics: Nursing Your Lungs

This special infographic was sent from Sarah Wenger and I would like to share to you, my readers.

If you are a smoker,  you know that Ramadhan is exciting our every cell right now and i think it’s time for us to take the best out of it — by quit smoking. Yes, I know it’s hard.

It’s so hard.

It changes everything.

When I mean everything, it means everything.

EVERYTHING.

It changes the way you smell, the way you talk, the way you speak, the way you drive your behavior, the way you breathe the air.

It changes your fundamental values, your principles, and your philosophy.

It changes your money wise, your expenses, and your contribution to the economy.

It changes your community interaction, since you don’t want to get along with smokers that always have upper hands to fail your mission to quit.

You feel frustrated because, the only social skill you are good at, is when you ‘re getting smoke outside building and interact with the people around you.

It may takes a while to gain a new social skill.

You will some of lose your old smoking friends’ closeness as you gain new social friends that you may not even like their jokes, their too-good behaviors, their goals in life, their principles, and the way they’re thinking.

It changes the way you see people, the way you see the world.

You feel frustrated and resigned.

The only way to get away with all of this — is by getting a cigarette.

When you reached at this point, you know you are failed.

Back to square one. But don’t give up. It may take 100 times of trials before you permanently stop smoking.

Change is a revolution. I know this is insignificant to some other people. But to us, it’s a revolution.

This revolution needs a million of changes,
…needs a thousand times failure,
…and one success.

Alright, enough talking. Enjoy the infographic.

Nursing Your Lungs
Created by: www.OnlineNursingPrograms.com

Why I hate Multilevel Marketing Business (MLM).. and the people in it.

Photo: ProfessorYackle

IT ALL BEGAN WITH.. 

1. I’d got a message from old, long lost-contact friend, saying that he had a business opportunity he wanted to share with me.

2. With the 20 percent shares he allocated for me to pursue business together.

3. The world started crumbling down when I realized that the business that he eager to jump start with me, was another goddamn dinosaur-like multilevel marketing business.

4. I need someone to be my punch bag.

LET ME TELL YOU THIS AGAIN..

5. I couldn’t help myself but to get excited when my friend — ex school mate — invited me to join venture to set sail in the world of air industrial business.

6. Since his educational background was engineering, I assume he knows the business like the back of his hand.

7. He told me that:

  • He got consulted by a lawyer to help him in developing his business,
  • A business coach to make things rest assured;
  • and A banker to aid with the financial constraints so that the business will not be disrupted by those monetary nonsense.

8. So that Sunday, I started to text messaging with him like lovers. Even my wife started to get jealous,

“what’s the deal between you and your cellphone?”

“Oh, don’t tell me that you feel something bad about me just because I’m texting someone longer than you”

9. My wife was frowning during our painful conversation. I told myself she didn’t understand. But she would when I brought home a Toyota Estima key for her, benefited from a profit of my future business.

10. OMG, I was dreaming before the business had even started.

11. Then I told my wife to soothe her feeling “It’s my old friend. Okay. Relax. I will not do something funny in front of you. Beside, there’s a business opportunity here and I will not turn it into a wasteland”

12. After break fast, I grabbed my keys and off to Kuala Lumpur. There was a long-time-no-see meeting going on at KLCC with me and my old friend.

13. Yes, something funny had happened.

 

IT’S A TRICK

14. And I could picture that my wife would be laughing at me when I told her I was tricked by so-called MLM businessman.

15. I remember a day before, My wife started to get mad at me when I told her that I would not be here to have the iftar with her (Iftar: break fasting or berbuka puasa).

16. When my friend told me this meeting was all about MLM; I realized my lovely wife’s madness was truly worthwhile.

17. My innner voice was telling me that it was a really, really stupid idea to substitute the intimacy of doing iftar together with my wife, just to meet with the old friend and his business proposal.

18. So I cancel the meeting and rescheduled it after having iftar with my wife. And that decision was right the moment.

19. I realized the word MLM came out of my friend’s mouth like a loath of vomit.

20. My blood was draining out and off my face. I could feel my wrath running wild around my head. I would be relief I could smack the hell out of his face.

21. That moment got me rewind back to where my wife frowning because I couldn’t have iftar with her so I could meet my old friend.

22. Wife, thank you for doing that; that frowning / tantrum / merajuk thing. I would put myself into eternal self-purgatory for life if I abandoned my wife alone with our kids.

 

DEALING WITH MLM PEOPLE

23. My mind was a stormy sea. And it’s generating heat inside of me. If I had powers like Kratos in the God of War games, I would hit him off the ground with the double-chained blade and do the immortal hits on him, along with his self-righteous fellow friend, and the MLM products they slept with, as well.

24. But I still had a respect for him because I’d known him for years now and he was my school mate.

25. My heart’s thumping, instructed me to burst down the double door of the hall and left him in confusion. But I got hold of myself at that moment.

26. Instead, I followed my brain and carried my respect for him.

27. As for that, I wasted almost four hours listening on how their MLM product could shoot earth’s garbage into space.

28. Thank god I was good at listening and absorbed nothing.

29. This was not the first time I was approached by an MLM salesperson. And I always knew what he would be saying. I could pick most of his words ahead of him.

30. You always knew what they would be saying like: how dirty the conventional business is and the good way of doing business is by network marketing.

DOWNWARD IS THE WAY FORWARD

31. Now, how he tricked me to get excited about this business was simple. From the first text message to end of our meeting, he never mentioned any typical words or terminologies of multilevel marketing like MLM, downline, upline, PV (point value), generations, kaki, pyramid, network and so on.

32. Instead, he carefully picked up words of legal business entity like share partner, business proposal, contract, maintenance, closed sale, project, overseas market, and so on.

33. He was so clever that he never let me opened my mind — not even the slightest idea — into thinking: there would be a grim reaper of Multilevel Marketing waiting, on the corner, to decapitate my neck.

34. In 45 minutes of his presentation, I never rose a question about anything. I sat still like a stone.

35. What really annoying about his presentation was, he applied the fundamental of marketing that I already learned: the product life cycle, product establishment, brand recognition, 4 types of people in marketing world, A.I.D.A Model, types of promotion, marketing strategies, and so on.

36. If someone didn’t have such a marketing knowledge, they might be mesmerized by his presentation.

37. They must be thinking hard on how to penetrate my MLM-proof mind and turned me into a zombie of the night..

38 ..and giving them my money right away.

39. But they failed to do that to me.

40. For all I knew, I was listening to words that he said but never let him constructing an insidious inception inside my mind.

Conclusion:

41. My hatred of Multilevel Marketing model was so deep that I could dig a well of infamous articles and join forces with Aididleaks like there’s no tomorrow.

42. And I feared that it would become my greatest passion: to elevate all MLM companies to the seventh level of atmospheres and gravitate them down so fast to the ground that the impact would bring the horror of vibrations miles away, the sound of the wrath would echo for millenniums, and everything would be laid to waste.

43. So to anyone, especially my fellow friends, don’t you ever persuade or trick me to let me step into your door of endless promises. Because if you do, I will never acknowledge my respect for you and then I will advance against you, above manner and morality.

44. Now, I can rephrase the 4400′s most famous quote: “We are at war now, don’t pick the wrong side.”

 

Heartbreak at Annur


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Last week, I had a heartbreak. My daughter broke my heart. Not like she didn’t love me back, or frowning when I expected her to smile back at me. She broke my heart in a way of not being strong enough to be a healthy girl.

It all started when I received a call from my wife, telling me Widad had been warded due to problems with her lungs. And this was what happened after that : I saw my heart, like a fragile mirror, free falling in the air and about to fall into pieces — million of pieces. I was just standing there, waiting for that burning motion to be completed.

I reminded myself: It’s just a light complication in her lung and the doctor just followed the procedures.

There’s nothing death about it.

My bright morning turned into black and white.

How am I going to do work if I can’t stop thinking about her?

My wife told me that she’d be alright, the world’s still here, and there’s nothing to worry about. The doctor needed to examine thoroughly because my daughter failed to respond with the antibiotic given, prior to the day before that.

To tell you the truth, I’m not a strong person when it comes to deal with emotions. That event didn’t weigh any magnitude to bring my daughter to fatality phase or endanger her life completely. I should feel relax because she would be alright after all. But the thing was, I failed to do that.

Outside, my face was showing no sad emotion whatsoever. I even fooled myself with the brightest smile when co-workers passing by.

But I was trembling inside.

I didn’t know what I was feeling then. But I knew things around me seemed like slowly vaporizing, pixelating into darkness. My eyes were half shut like nothing to see. Really, there’s nothing to see if someone I love was bedridden.

If there’s a powerful drug that could turn endless crying into everlasting smile, in a merely second, I swore to god I would buy it. I didn’t care if I had sell my kidney. Because every second Widad crying in agony, it sent a coding error to my world. If it went beyond reparable level, all I could see was numbers and figures, just like the Matrix.

I grabbed my bag, ignored everyone else, and rushed to the front door. My legs kept shaking while waiting for elevator to open. Thank god I wasn’t trip over when I was walking into the elevator — I was thinking hard about my daughter I forgot to control my steps. I pushed G button so hard I just don’t care if it went broke or not. Then, I pushed my way forward to KL Sentral Komuter station.

It took 45 minutes to arrive at my destination. Along that way, I was recollecting my moment with Widad, her smile, her childish acting, her cute new-learner legs that sometimes you lose confidence in her to walking straight on her own, and her curly hair that reminded me of how much she resembled me. She is mine and always be mine.

I was Feeling deprived and sadness when I entered into the elevator. It took me and 5 other persons up to level 3. I walked out of the elevator to find my daughter’s ward.

****

[Lily One Ward, Widad Saffiyah]

I was standing in front of it for a few seconds and reached a door knob with my right hand.

A bright light, came from the slight of the open door, blinded my eyes right before I saw my wife and my daughter. I put a smile on my face. My wife immediately noticed that I was wearing weird, stone look as if a mindset of emotions was drained out of me. I responded that I needed to see our daughter and then everything would be OK.

My daughter smiled at me. Like a Walt Disney cartoon, enchanted flowers manifested around her in a magical way.

7 Signs That Make Me Love Them More

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Lars Plougmann

I have read the article and now I know signs that my children loves me not. Ok, if the signs didn’t show anything love affection upon me, I don’t mind. Just love your mom. I’m dad’ I’m not suppose to get loved by my children. I have to support financially, and your mom will support you emotinally.

Now, I want to list out, as well, 7 sign that makes me love my children more and by the way, I keep on falling in love — from awesomeness to pure insanity — with my children if they keep doing these things below:

1. Smile
Ever see my daughter smile? I bet you will fall in love too. Because it burns> my stress away everytime she smiles, especially Mondays to Fridays, when I open the front door at 6.30 pm. There she is — smiling like the beatles song.

2. Cry when im gone
Oh, please don’t cry. I feel like I want to quit my job take care of you guys all the time. But somehow, if I got RM 5.0 millions in my bank, with potential growth of 5%, hedge with the inflation rate, I will definitely quit my job. Everytime they cry I leave them at Tadika, I heart breaks and they make me to love them more.

3. Catch me when im at the door.
To see them smiling at me, layered with the running of my son and the crawling of my baby girl, are the things that makes me feel heaven when I’m back from work.

And I couldn’t ask for more.

4. They Want to show me something.
I feel excited when Amirul grabs my hand and mumbling about something he has greatly done. I really want to tell him that I want this moment to happen a hundred times, but for sure he will not understand of what I will be saying. I enjoy every second of it and I feel like my every cells dancing when I give my respond to him.

5. Ask me for a milk.
I feel like to I was assigned for a mission when Amirul ask me for a milk. It’s really get more exhilarating when the ask happened at 3 in the morning. I wouldn’t to making a bottle of milk of him. As long as he stays healthy and strong.

6. Ask me to sleep with them.
Most of the nights, Amirul keep standing beside my chair and stares blankly at the laptop screen while I’m doing my work. I feel like battle between writing vs sleep with my children, through our mind, in complete silence. And Amirul still standing beside me, listening to the tapping of my keyboard, and like a mind game — he deploy booms and missiles beneath his smile and fascinating face. I got pity on him and lost the war like the Germans.

I never win the battle with Amirul. So i stop writing and go to sleep with him and get up early at 5 a.m.

7. Kiss n hug without asking.
I guess I get appreciated by them when they kiss me without giving notice of demand to them. When my heart hurts and trying to struggle in the dark, I got kissed and hugged and my world is full of sunshine once again.

I could list down more signs that make me love them more. But lets try to keep it short and simple. If you have something in your mind — that you love what your children do and consequencely make you love them more. Please put them on comment box below.

[7 Signs That Kids Love You via BabyCenter]

Cyber Addiction

Many people, including me, would be easily fall into the cyber addiction because the internet is so awesome.

The most awesome benefit is that the internet is about connecting you with people around the globe. Then, there are unlimited source of information; appropriate and inappropriate ones. And then came along — internet gaming and social networking, making the real world dull and gray.

And that things become an addiction when you overuse it with excessive amount of time. You feel like connecting with virtual cloud of PCs is much more appealling than connecting with real people

“Cyber addicts will start withdrawing emotionally from their families. Their minds are on their online relationships instead,” Malaysian Psychiatric Association president Dr Abdul Kadir Abu Bakar.

“Simple things like shopping together, a walk in the park and daily family time at night plays a big role in bonding family relationships,” he said, adding that this issue affected children, too.

Ok. I admit it. I guess like I’m about one step closer to the cyber addiction, because I can sit and sink into my chair and surfing the internet 8 hours long.

When my internet was disconnected for two weeks, I hardly breathe and only my wife knows how panic I was, like in the middle of a war.

May be going to zoo this weekend would be a good start to exit the addiction.

[Strong ties curb cyber addiction via TheStar]

‘How To Get Your Children To Eat Healthy?’ Good Foods & Bad Foods

After short but meaningful explanation about picky eater from Dr Azam, Dietation Nor Lizawati Che Lah, explain to us about good and bad foods to chidlren.

Children more attractive to sugary foods like chocolates, junk foods, fast foods like KFC, Mc Donalds and processed foods like burger, sausages etc. Those foods actually bad foods for them. Besides high in sugar and salt, they also consists of MSG (mono sodium glutamate) to enhance the foods tastes.This MSG can cause obesity and hyperactivity in children.

Therefore, the good foods for children are :

  • Oil fish, high in DHA for body immunity system
  • Cooked green leafy vegetables
  • Colourful of fruits and vegetables
  • Wholegrain bread, eggs, milk, cheese
  • Lean red meat

Thus, it is highly recommended for parent to give home cooked meals to their children. Beside they know what they eat, the cleanliness also guarantee.

 

Read on ‘How to prepare home cooked’ tips from Gourmet Goo co-owner Heidi Shamsuddin.

How To Deal With Parenting Problems



The Main Idea: job as a parenting is more demanding than you think.

  • parenting is a lifetime job. There’s no try-out, escape, or just testing.
  • It ask to be more enlightened parent. For me, we really need to put pressure — a good pressure I must say — on our children, and not be supportive and kind in all aspects
  • You should know that parenting is hard and there are a lot of obstacles to be a good dad

    • WeightLossRevisited wrote:

    Parenting is the hardest job and that applies as to if you’re a first time mother or father or whether you already have several kids. Parenting is probably the most underpaid job ever and you do not even earn anything from being a parent.

    I am a father of two children and It really testing my patience; the truth is , I can’t manage my temper when it comes to nursing them. The reason I don’t hire local or Indonesian maid because I want to take part in nurturing them to become great adult.

    I try to improve myself by reading, and writing about my children. Parenting is turning me into a better man with responsibility.

    [ How To Deal With Parenting Problems via WeightLossRevisited]

    Planning What To Do When You Are Online

    Photo: Federico Morando

    In the era of internet age and the beauty of informations, I could sit in front my laptop all day until midnight, just doing blank surfing that contributes nothing to productivity. I see myself turned into information junkie that I can swallow any informations — most of them are unnecessary — clouded on the internet.

    The information on the internet is so beauty, I could lost touch with reality. If my mind isn’t sanity enough, I would let myself careless about being a good father, and lover; and sit down in front of PC, and ignore all my responsibilities for the day, because I need to quench my thirst of information addiction.

    Celestine Chua Wrote:
    Without setting this intention clear, you can be easily distracted by the barrage of things online once you log on. Write a list of things you want to do that can only be done online. For example, say you’re writing a report and you need to research on the topic. You also want to check your mail for updates from clients. Then, follow this list and strike each item off once it’s completed. If you come across something online that’s not in your list, that’s a distraction and you should ignore it.
    Yes, I agree with that. When doing things on the internet,we needs to have goals, like financial goals for 2011. Planning when you are online or else, by the end of the day, I realized that I was not doing anything good to myself or to my family. I lost my focus and concerned about things weren’t important. If you a need help, try read this book: Focus. And it’s free.
    After you read, you will feel a lot better and you can control yourself when you need to focus.

    The Elephant and The Rope [opinion]

    Photo: el patojo

    Kids these days have unlimited potential that we should not — ever — disrupt their potential with decision like this; determine to what’s good to play and what’s not good to play. Let them have it what they want.

    Ok, stop right now. If we pretend that our child is so full with potential that we have no right to restrict them at all, then there’s something with this society.  If we agree that by implementing restriction, we discourage our children to spark the creativity within – then all I could say that it is so unwise. We should have some restriction on them, mostly on discipline issues.
    Zaid Mohamad wrote:
    “The story about the elephant goes something like this. Ever since it was born, the baby elephant was tied to a small rope. Every time the elephant moved, the rope would restrict it. During its growing years, it could only move around within the area allowed by the rope’s length.As it grew older and stronger, the rope was never changed. It looked ridiculously fragile to hold such a strong animal, but years of restricted movement had conditioned the elephant to think that the rope had the power to stop its movement. It stopped trying to free itself long ago because it had failed to do so during its early years. As a result, the elephant remained tied to the brittle rope till its death.”
    I think we must have rope in every kid’s life because the story of the elephant is about discipline and structure. How come we should not guide them in proper way and let them lost in their own fantasy? Sometimes, the kids need the invisible hand, just like the government did to us.
    But fair enough, too much restriction may discourage your kids talent and therefore, we should determine what to restrict.
    Determine what to restrict.
    Determine restriction that can make them know what is wrong and right. For instance, I will definitely –without remorse– land my rotan on my kids’ hand if they touched electrical plug that can endanger their life, or hit the glass door with their bare hand.
    Other than that, they all can bombard with their toys to every inch of living, dining, and bedroom.
    I agree with Zaid that we have to unleash our children potential, but I don’t buy his elephant story. Every life has a major breakthrough. If the rope was so fragile, then the strong elephant could easily unleashed the power, untie the rope.

    [Smart Parenting: Unleash your child’s potential via NewStraitsTimes]

    Avoid Criticizing In Front Of Children


    Photo: nouQraz

    Have you ever been hit by emotional disruption when your spouse has a disagreement about raising your children? Sometimes we talk to each other so much we don’t realize that we are sparring against each other’s words. We refuse to let go our ego, we belittle each other in front our kids!! So much for the couple unity. And it’s will effect our children behavior if we continue to show intolerable attitude in front of them.

    Babycenter wrote:

    “Present a united front to your child. Avoid criticizing your partner if he’s in the middle of responding to a situation. Plan ahead to avoid future clashes by talking through key issues when you’re both relaxed.
    Agree to disagree. You’ll be able to compromise on many issues but not all. In those cases, the one who’s with the child the most should hold more sway.Stick to specifics. Limit your discussion to a narrow issue (how much TV to permit) rather than wading off into generalities (“You always undermine what I say”).”

    Yes, I have weaknesses. Guess what? I have troubles in hiding my emotion when it comes to disagreement with my wife. Then, I would talk and argue and so on without realizing my kid is standing in front of me.

    I hope I will change my attitude, for the sake of my children, and show some parenting unity.

    Of iPad and Bicycle



    Photo:esti

    Tie their shoes and use a smartphone application are not realistic and comparable issues. They will learn – it’s just a matter of time – how to do tie their shoes someday. That doesn’t concern me as a parent. But unable to compete and become orangutans in the field of the most important industry: ICT, will bother me for the rest of my life.

    “Software maker AVG Technologies conducted a survey amongst 2,200 women and found that 14 percent of kids aged 4 to 5 could tie their shoes-compared to 21 percent who knew how to use a smartphone or iPad application.”

    Admit it, video games or advanced technologies that can wow our eyes, also make our heart beats faster, and bicycle is so over us. Back when I was a kid, me and my brother were blinded by Nintendo, Micro Genius, and [link: other pioneer gaming consoles] in the 80s. Like a wheel of bicycle, It happened as well as to our younger generations — only with more technological advanced gadgets.

    “Among kids aged 2 to 5, 52 percent knew how to ride a bike, while 58 percent could play a computer game and 69 percent could operate a computer mouse. Twenty percent knew how to swim, but 25 percent could open a Web browser.”

    The reason why I don’t get mad when my children choose iPad over bicycle is because they need to be well-versed in ICT by getting exposed to technologies – that’s my goal. It’s okay if they dislike bicycle. I force them to learn swimming.

    [Kids prefer iPad or smartphone to a new bike via MalaysiaSun ]

    Speech Therapy Diary: The First Appointment – Video (Two-by-Two Instructions)

    Yesterday, Mr Hubby updating about Amirul’s 1st speech theraphy appointment. Alhamdulillah, Amirul catch up well and the progression went good so far. As the doctor had given ‘homework’ to us to practice what we learned during the theraphy session, here is what we did at home.

    Match the lego with picture;
    Two-by-Two instruction – This activity is a little bit harder at first. Give him 2 lego and instruct him to match the with two pictures

    Speech Therapy Diary: Identified Amirul Level of Speech Delay

    My name is Amirul Arshad Mohd Mujahid. I am 2 year 9 months old. I am a happy healthy and active toddler. I love to explore new things and try new skills. I can walk at age of 11months, I can run fast at age of 13months, I can climb the stair steadily at age of 15months, I understand most of Mummy & Daddy instructions. BUT, I am a quite boy. I don’t talk much. I prefer to stay quite and observe and listen to what people saying. By age of 2, I seldom talk. I just nodding my head and use sign languages. Mummy and Daddy get worried. People surround me also frigtened Mummy & Daddy saying that I’m having communication problem. They claim maybe I am autisme toddler. Mummy & Daddy afraid BUT, they don’t put stress on me. They keep teaching me and talk to me more now (they both love to sit infront of laptop for the whole day and they also talk less).. huhuh

    Feb 2011, I will turn 3 years old BUT, I still talk in my languages which difficult to understand by most of people. Sometimes I get stress. Mummy & Daddy also get stress because do not undertsand what I am trying to express. By age of 3, I should carry on a conversation of two to three sentences and speaks clearly. BUT, I just managed to talk ‘ nak milk, amma, dit, anya, nak air, yak’ not a complete sentence. Then Mummy & Daddy have decided to bring me to have a speech therapy treatment.

    Lets see what I had done for my 1st appointment. Before I started my speech therapy, I need to do audiometric test. This test is to check whether my ear have problem or not.

    Q’s for registration number

    I’ll be doing my audiometric test here

    Daddy will accompany me doing this test, while mummy buzy expressing milk for baby Widad

    I’m bored. Waiting for 1/2 hour to start the test. Lucky Om Jabbar made an appointment for me. Thanks Om.

    They put something into my ear canal and start the test. I do not know what test is that. “Daddy, what test is this?? I’m forget Amirul.” But I knew they are checking my hearing level

     


    Test started : I need to listen to the sound and stack the block accordingly. I heard a series of tones which is loud and it’s getting softer later. Alhamdulillah I managed to hear every sound that come out.  After few minutes, I need to wear ear muff and do the same thing. Again I heard a series of tones through the ear muff. I need to listen carefully to the sound and stack the block accordingly. I also saw the doctor control the tones to check my degree of hearing.

     


    Continued from 1st video

    This is the result. Doctor said I have a good hearing and no problem with it.

    20dB, meaning I can hear the leaves fall, the sound of river and the bird chirp

    My real speech therapy will be on Jan 2011. I will update what I’ve being doing during the session. Till now, I saw mummy reading a book tittle ” How to teach your Toddler to read”. I will ask mummy to review the book later. But the question is ‘ when will mummy finish reading the book.. huhuh’

    Amirul 32 Months Old Milestones

    Amirul now 32 months or 2 years 8 months. Alhamdulillah, he grow well, healthy besides his asthma condition, active, shy like his daddy, sometimes takes time to socialise. More Amirul’s milestones at 32 months:

  • Getting better at doing things for himself  like take off clothes and diaper, washing and drying hand before and after foods
  • Still wearing diaper. However, he now telling us if he poo or pee. “Amma, yak . Aikk saper yang poo ni, mummy ker Amirul.. then he’s smiling and immediately takes off his pants and go to toilet”
  • His current vocab : Amma = Mummy, Dit = Daddy, Anya = Baby Widad, Yak = Berak, Milk = milk, E-iou = tractor, Ueu-Ueu = Chicken, Ayis = Haris, Air = Air, etc. Its quite worrying us because Amirul still speak few words, however, we will wait patiently. Will update on Amirul speech therapy appointment later
  • His current sentence : Nak milk = he want milk, Amma nk Woody = Mummy nk watch ToyStory, Nak air = nak air, etc
  • His one leg balancing skill much better. He plays scooter well now.
  • Treat his little sister well and loves her so much.

    • More on 32 months old milestones via BabyCentre

    Becoming A Good Father. (Don’t A Parent If..)

    Photo By: Gilzee

    1. I’ve got a link from ChristianCollegeOnline argues that if someone could not fit to be a good parent because of some several factors.

    2. I couldn’t agree more. If, for example, a person believe that couldn’t bring home adequate food for his children, then he should think twice before he gets married.

    3. Now, let’s look into Islamic practice.

    4. Our religion encourage us to get married. When you’re married, you accomplished half of Islam. The credit too big to ignore for Muslimin and Muslimat. Obviously, married couple tend to get children someday.  Thus, they shall take responsible when they become parents.

    5. Nevertheless, we should look into the points. It is make sense to me:
    Ten Ways to Tell You’re Not Cut Out For Parenthood ;

    • If you struggle to make ends meet
    • If you aren’t in a stable and happy marriage/relationship
    • If you aren’t willing to sacrifice your needs and wants
    • If you have substance abuse problems
    • If your are married to your job
    • If you or your partner is unsure about having kids
    • If you aren’t a patient person
    • If you are depressed or moody
    • If you can’t get by with little to no sleep
    • If you have little to no experience with children of different ages

    6. No one will enforce to have children or not once you get married, it’s your choice. Having children should make marriage life much better. But, are you willing to take heavy responsibilty becoming father or mother? Are you ready to make sacrifice some of your importance like friends, social life, hobbies and job?

    Bonding Dad-And-Son Relationship

    1. A typical and consecutive father thinks that he is way above ‘taking care of his children’ task. For him, a man should think about how to survive, or how to feed a family needs.

    2. A typical father thinks; He is the man of the family. He is the leader of the family. He is the one who brings foods and money, that keep the blood of the family circulating. He is the important guy, that all the members of his family depend on him. Cannot live without him.

    3. And that guy is me because I’m always thinking like that.

    4. So why I should give a concern about nursing my child? An important guy should not do the messy work. Why not let his mother take care of it? Besides, raising children is not my type of work. That work is so easy that my wife would miss a fortune if she give me a chance to intervene with wash-the-baby’s-poops thing. Well, I guess I should know more about rising kids then.. because I was totally wrong.

    4. I was so wrong I was forced myself to change.

    5. For the first time in my life, I’m getting involved in taking care of my children, and helping my wife with daily chores, and cleaning up every time my children attack my house with atomic bomb. This time I’m going to focus about my steps to develop a father’s bonding with his own children.

    6. Below are my steps that I voluntarily decided to do (when every typical father and his reading newspaper calls it Kamikaze) :

    • Midnight Bottle. It’s hard to open your eyes, even a millimeter. It’s getting harder when you have to make a bottle of milk. But 3 about month or so, I’m getting to use about it and I feel like sleepwalking; I hardly notice that I wake up consciously.
    • Changing Diaper. I change my Amirul’s diaper most of the time. When he automatically stand in front of me, synchronously touching his diaper and make an awkward smile, I know I have to enforce my superhuman strength and change his diaper.
    • Bathing together. I will not slip my chance to play a million bubbles with my children when weekend comes.
    • Accompany him until he’s sleeping. I forget all my favorite TV series just to accompany him to sleep. What a sacrifice.
    • Take a ride with him. Just when we tired of playing ball, pretend flying, and watching cartoon, I try to hit the road with him. It is fun.
    • Go to shopping mall together. I only got a chance to do it once when my wife was at her mom’s house in Kelantan. That was when we rolling out together

    7. When my friends ask me join weekly futsal, I said NO because I have to take of my children during night time. Instantly, they were smirking at me like I’m some kind of a joke.

    8. That’s what you get when you put your family a light year in advance and everything else back in blackhole.

    9. You leave your social friends, your hanging-out companions, and even your friendship system, just to building the true value of your family; Bonding With Your Children.

    10. Your friends might joke, tease, or belittle you about how you can’t enjoy life after work. Well, I don’t give a damn about a single weight they said.

    The new baby and the changes she made

    My second baby was born on 28th April, 2010. Alhamdulillah that my baby took after my wife, but with additional melanin on her skin, contrary with Amirul. Her nose was flat, round and very flared with short bridge.

    Her hair, as I expected, was naturally straight and black. She only inherits my skin color. Everything else, she got from her mother, which is good.

    I didn’t know at the moment, to describe about how much love to smell her cheek, and how much I love to hold her all night long. A sudden cheer went inside me when I was changing her diaper. I felt an euphoria high when my nose touched her.

    But there are several changes that she made in my life. Some of the changes, I can cope easily as I had an experience with my first baby, and some of them made me harder to breathe.

    Here I list out the changes that she made (or will make in near future):

    ./1. My new baby plan the schedule for me. Once a week I will plan and organize the activities and tasks for the next week, and strictly follow it. I would rather say that it was more efficient when using google calendar because it can be viewed on multiple places such as office.

    Since my baby’s arrival, I agreed to babysit her whenever my wife felt exhausted and out of energy. So even when I’m administrating my eBay or writing a blog post, I have to stop and respond when my wife or my new baby needs my help. When this happened several times during my planned task, it disturbed my concentration.

    After getting the baby thing done, it took time to develop momentum when I sat to my desk again. .

    ./2. A little time for myself.. or no time at all. I play Wii games or watch movies whenever I got free time. My daughter took away my free time when she’s doing her thing; crying. My free time was disturbed, just like my sleeping. But I found diamond in it. Instead of playing Wii, I started reading parenting books.

    ./3. She switched on the zombie mode. I felt numb and sleepy again when doing my work at office. My sleeping hour was disturbed by several crying and moaning. Altthough my wife was in charge in changing diapers as well as breastfeeding at this moment. I felt like a compulsory to accompany her. So as I falling asleep, I was doing head banging in slow motion at my workstation. It was like Amirul, all over again.

    ./4. My money takes the lighting ride. Since my daughter arrived, I spent a lot of money to fill her small wardrobe. Buying disposable diapers is one of the significant expenses this month. Looking back at the receipt, we have bought 2 packs of newborn diaper in just 2 weeks (it contains 86 diapers per pack). 

    ./5. I scent her smile whenever I see flowers. As her arrival was announced, suddenly the world was filled up with bright colors and the air was breezing softly. I was the happiest daddy on earth that day. I caught myself smiling just thinking of your smell.

    I try to overhauling the timetable or planning other solutions to cater the changes. The only thing that I find appropriate is that I have to sleep early, as early as 8.30 pm and wake up at 3.00 am. Then at 6 am, I take shower and prepare myself to go to work. My baby has changed my timetable, my sleep, and my life. I hope she will change everything that’s good in our life into better ones.

    Photo Credit: BostonHerald

    When Amirul Refuses To Follow Commands

    When Amirul Refuses To Follow Commands

    Photo Credit: itorganization2017

    Amirul got this first pinch (cubit-cubitan) as early as 20 months old. As soon as he understand what his both father and mother are saying, he have to follow instructions. If he followed smoothly without whining and screaming, he gets his reward such as kiss, hug, vitagen, and chocolate.

    If he refused to do it just because he don’t want to, he’ll get what I’ve listed down here:

    1} Say his name out loud with bold voice. See if he able to understand that I mean serious, and no more play time. Normally he understands and follow the instructions.

    2} Staring at him. If the no.1 step fail to excite him, just stare at him, wearing angry look and show the sign I really want him to follow my command.

    3} Pinch. I used to get pinched from my mother. I was a naughty boy, the aggressive one who uncontrollable if you don’t slap me, pinch me, or pull my ears. But I practice this step if only number 1 and number 2 fail to register inside his head.

    4} Just ignore him. This one is the critical step. Usually I will not hug him after I pinched him no matter how poorly he cried and how strongly hug me at my leg. Soothe him will not suggest any help in developing his discipline.

    These are the important things that if Amirul refused to do it, the pinches would land on his tummy:
    1} Bathing Time. – If Amirul didn’t want to take a bath after three times I told him, he will get spanked.

    2} Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner – If Amirul still playing and running after received a friendly warning from me.

    3} Sleeping Time – Our sleeping time is at 9.30 pm. If he didn’t want to sleep.

    I prefer authoritarian parenting style. In fact, the style has been practiced since our great grandfather.  There are good things and bad things about it. You have to contain your anger. If you let the anger controls you, it will hurt your children. Do it with good faith.

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